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Movie Review:The guilty pleasure movie of 2010 has arrived! PIRANHA 3D is terrifying and hilarious. The perfect blend of horror and comedy. Forget everything you remember about the old originals cause director Aja’s version is fun, f*ed up, sexy and the 3D conversion works awesome!.. Finally, a 3D movie that’s more than just about your ordinary depth of field, this one straight up jumps at you and you’ll be either screaming or cringing at every gory shocking scene that flashes its way on to the screen. Now keep in mind that PIRANHA 3D is an awful, awful movie, but the kind that you’d wanna watch again and again and it’s got a lot of reasons for you to do exactly that.
From director Alexandre Aja (“The Hills Have Eyes”) comes the new action thriller “Piranha.” Every year the population of sleepy Lake Victoria explodes from 5,000 to 50,000 for Spring Break; a riot of sun and drunken fun. But this year, there’s something more to worry about than hangovers and complaints from local old timers; A new type of terror is about to be cut loose on Lake Victoria. After a sudden underwater tremor sets free scores of the prehistoric man-eating fish, an unlikely group of strangers must band together to stop themselves from becoming fish food for the area’s new razor-toothed residents.
This is the type of movie that you don’t judge by the acting or the cinematography or the writing or the art direction or the costume or the story. Nope, If you’ve come for that, then you’re in the wrong theater buddy, go down the hall, two doors to your right for Inception.
PIRANHA 3D is the type of movie that’ mindless, simple, and yet every bit as intense and bloddy as the trailer suggests.
This movie’s got countless boobies, it has Kelly Brook and Riley Steele completely naked doing underwater ballet…male audiences would think they’d hit a jackpot, it’s like watching soft core porno and… well yeah.. like watching soft core porno.
Jerry O’Connell is hilarious as the crazy Wild Wild Girls filmmaker, a character loosely based on the founder of Girls Gone Wild, Joe Francis. O’Connell in my book meets the most excruciating fate in this movie. One that no guy should every have to experience but one that his douchebag maniac perverted character somewhat deserves.
My only disappointments are that funnyman Paul Scheer doesn’t get to be funny at all and Oscar nominee Elisabeth Shue acts like an amateur, she’s not that convincing, you can’t really see the fear for her children, but maybe that’s part of the joke in PIRANHA 3D, to have Scheer play O’Connel’s little b*tch and Shue knows that she doesn’t need to go all method for something like PIRANHA 3D because ass, boobies, and thousands of pissed off killer fish are the lead stars, they take the front seats.
If you think Ving Rhames is one badass mothaf*ka, it’s been validated by PIRANHA 3D.
Bodies mangled, heads scalped, eyeballs floating, penis floating. What’s makes it even super gross is that the Piranhas are only after the meat, so often times they’d leave the bones whole so you’d see somebody still screaming in pain because part of his right leg has been eaten away but the bones are still intact. F*ck shock value, this is more like shock insanity, the most obscene, disgusting things you can imagine is here in PIRANHA 3D.
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